The school-bag curse

I call it “ The cursed school-bag”.

A flashback to our school days, when the prized possession or rather a status symbol was the robust, khaki-coloured shoulder bag made of thick cloth. The canvas ones were considered inferior. Slung across both shoulders, the bag laden with books, note-books, pencil box, geometry box, etc. would weigh us down. At the same time, it acted as a counter-weight to straighten our spines which helped us over the years, even as we crossed paths with numerous spineless people.

As a small boy, I made light work of the heavy khaki bag on my shoulders and used to run around to catch a friend or race with another. More than that, when we started travelling by public transport, I used to wade my way through crowded buses knocking people on the sides, in front , in the rear courtesy my school-bag. I was always in a hurry and hence more the collisions, more the ‘ sshs, Be careful, watch out’ and above all murmured curses from the various uncles and aunties — ‘ This boy should also be whacked from all sides with this heavy bag”. Angry glares would follow the murmured or hissed curses. Cursing the school-bag and indirectly me!

Fast forward a few decades to the present. Gone are the days when office-goers carried briefcases. Now it is the age of the laptop which everyone started carrying in shoulder-bags, either slung across both shoulders or carelessly hanging on one. As the laptop is a valuable possession, in terms of data, the bag does not present much problems. The bag is carried carefully to ensure there are no collisions. There are however laptop bags without laptops and much larger rucksacks and some of them certainly qualifying as over-dimensional cargo. These non-laptop bags create problems.

The carriers of these bags feel they have right of way everywhere with their hands free and the bag freely hanging from one or both shoulders. Let the guy behind be careful, not my problem, they seem to say.

As I am standing in a crowded lift in an office complex, a guy enters with a huge bag and turns his back on me ( the bag blocking my view) but at a reasonable distance. Now more people enter the lift and our friend pushes back nonchalantly, forgetting that poor me is behind me. The bag hits me on the solar plexus and I let out an “Ouch”. Bag-man turns back and mutters a “Sorry”. I smile stupidly and say it’s okay, even as I curse him silently. Ha, The Cursed School-bag is getting its victim. Me- I realise.

Another time, another bag-man ahead of me in a lift. There is not too much crowd and there is a gap between bag-man and me. He is texting away furiously and suddenly he gets an interesting message/ picture on his mobile. He peers down closely, his neck going down…. then what? The see-saw effect! As he bends down, the huge shoulder bag comes up and brushes my chin gently. The cursed school-bag at work again.

Things cannot get worse, you may think and you will be wrong. An early boarder on the aisle seat of an aircraft and bags of various shapes, sizes and belonging to different genders bombard me. A guy with a large shoulder bag slung on his left shoulder ambles across and the bag hits my arm and as I move away reactively, he move a step further and now I am hit on the face. A lady chatting away on her mobile walks past, unmindful that her large bag has scraped the full length of my left arm. Next comes a guy with a bag across both shoulders. This will not hit me, I am feeling pleased. Just for a second though….. the man does a ninety degree turn as he attempts to remove the bag and place it in the overhead bin. While removing, he forgets me – Bang, bang, I’m hit on both cheeks. Can’t take it anymore. I burst out “ Don’t you have eyes? “. “ I’m so sorry , extremely sorry” is the response.

The aunties and uncles who cursed my school- bag and me must be smiling somewhere up there. The cursed school-bag is here to stay, it appears. Am sure you will now believe that curses are powerful and like sleeper-cells, stay dormant for years and then hit you.